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Q I had two dates with this gal who was attractive and nice enough but no sparks. When I didn’t ask her out again she called me and wanted to know why. When I told her it just didn’t work out for me, she accused me of having “commitment issues.” I’ve been divorced for three years and the way I see is that I just haven’t found the right match for me. Why would someone I barely know accuse me of having “commitment issues?”
A Women are notorious for translating a lack of interest into “his commitment issues.” Men, on the other hand, tend to translate unresponsiveness as “she needs more attention and seduction.” Until science finds a gene for mind reading, it would be better if men and women would accept indifference as a boundary. When you didn’t ask her for a third date, you set a boundary that she violated by insisting on a reason. Your reasons are none of her business. Let it go and move on. You can win at love!
Dr. B
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Hope to hear from you soon,
Dr. B
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